Why Sometimes, I Want to Quit Being a Mom (And That’s Okay)
Parenting is Hard – And Sometimes, I Just Want to Quit
I don't know about you, but there are days (and weeks!) where I just want to quit. I want to throw my hands up and say, “I quit. I don’t want this job anymore. I’m seeking a new one!” It's true. I own it. It’s not something I’m always proud of admitting, but I own it.
Being a mom is an all-in job. From the moment I became a mother, I’ve poured 100% of myself into this role—often at the expense of everything else, even my own well-being. It's something I’ve had to unlearn over the years, and I’m still practicing it. I’ve spent countless hours learning how to prioritize myself, how to fill up my own cup first, so I have enough energy to give. And, I do that. But even with my own cup filled, there are times when I still want to quit.
And this feeling hits especially hard when you’re a single parent, carrying the load all on your own without anyone to share the burden. Even when you’re partnered, it's often the mom who holds the majority of the load. I’m not discounting the amazing dads and partners out there—because they do step up—but let’s be real: more often than not, it’s the mom doing, well, everything.
Isn't it usually the mom who takes on the emotional labor? Who makes all the doctor’s and dentist’s appointments? Who signs the kids up for extracurriculars? Who packs the lunches, kisses the boo-boos, puts them to bed, cleans up the vomit, rubs their backs when they can’t sleep—all the extras that no one else thinks about?
I know I’m generalizing here, and I hope I’m not making any partners mad. Please know that I’m coming from the perspective of a single parent this week, and it’s hitting me harder than usual. And to top it off, I have a teenager and a preteen—so, just about anything that comes out of my mouth is often met with an eye-roll or a heavy sigh. These days, just existing can make someone mad.
I’m laughing as I write this, because, as ridiculous as it sounds, it’s also 100% real. This week, I attempted to take my son out driving. Notice the word “attempted”—because it didn’t go well. We both wanted to jump out of the car and run away from each other. Thankfully, there are driving instructors I can pay to do this for me. While I can’t fully escape the parenting journey, hiring help for certain things is such a relief.
Honestly, I don’t know exactly what my point is here—except just to say: parenting is hard. So, so hard. No one tells you that when you're young, in love, and dreaming of the perfect family. The rewards of parenthood absolutely outweigh the frustrations, but this week, I am feeling the frustrations big time. And that’s okay. That’s where I’m at right now.
I’m allowing myself to feel all these feelings of frustration. I’m lifting extra weights (both physical and emotional) and making an effort to rest more. I’m trying to show myself more grace than I usually do. I’m playing more music around the house and looking at pictures of puppies to remind myself that joy exists in small, fluffy things. And when I need to, I’m taking space for myself.
I am, without a doubt, 100% on when it comes to my kids—physically, emotionally, and mentally. I’m always here, attending to their needs. But what if I stepped back a little? What if I wasn’t constantly trying to manage my preteen daughter’s every mood and feeling? Honestly, what a joke. That’s an impossible task!
Maybe they would actually appreciate me stepping back and being a little less available. Maybe they would find value in having a little more space.
So, here’s the deal: I don’t have a video for you this week. I don’t have a somatic tip or technique to share. But I do have one homework assignment for you: If any part of this blog resonated with you, go take care of yourself! Go get a massage. Call a girlfriend and vent. Take a nap. Turn up the music and scream in your car. Do something—anything—that fills your cup, so you can keep showing up for your family in the best way possible.
Remember, it’s okay to not have it all together. It’s okay to feel the weight. And it’s more than okay to take a break when you need one.