Before You Talk Yourself Out of It
Do the thing.
Just do the damn thing.
Pretty sure there’s already a book with that title. Or maybe I’m just thinking of Nike’s slogan. Either way, I woke up this morning thinking about how much energy we humans spend getting in our own way.
It fascinates me how much we overcomplicate everything. And honestly, it’s not entirely our fault. Our systems and conditioning are built that way. Filling out a government form can feel confusing even for the savviest native English speakers. Finding a new apartment, applying for a new job, navigating modern life - these things are overwhelming.
But sometimes we overcomplicate even the smallest things:
Sending the text.
Starting the workout.
Trying the hobby.
Telling someone how we feel.
We feel a loving urge or inner nudge… and then immediately push it aside.
Why is following our inner nudges so hard?
Why do we discount the desires in our hearts (both the big ones and the tiny ones)?
And when I say we, I absolutely include myself in this.
But lately, whether it’s age, grief, healing, or simply too many years of not doing the thing, I think I can finally say: I’m doing the thing.
All the things.
I don’t want to live with regret anymore. I don’t want to leave important things unsaid. And honestly, that now feels far more uncomfortable to me than taking the risk.
Ignoring what I feel.
Silencing what my heart wants.
Overriding my own knowing.
That feels like death to me now.
And no, I’m not saying this simply because I recently lost a friend at 51. This isn’t a “life is short, carpe diem” speech.
I’m saying this because I think this is actually our natural state as humans.
I think we are meant to move, create, connect, and respond from something deeper than constant overthinking. Less from the mind. More from the body. More from the heart.
I truly believe we are moving into a more somatic way of living: listening to what our bodies are telling us and allowing ourselves to move from there.
Somewhere along the way, we became conditioned to believe we need to have everything figured out before we begin. Every detail mapped out. Every risk minimized. Every outcome guaranteed.
But when did we stop playing?
When did experimentation become so terrifying?
When did we start second-guessing ourselves into paralysis?
These are the questions I’ve been sitting with lately.
Because honestly? The sweet spot is often right at the beginning. Right when the urge first appears. Before the brain and ego swoop in with spreadsheets and fear and ten thousand imaginary scenarios.
If you wait too long, you’ll probably talk yourself out of it.
And listen, I do believe in process. I believe even the overthinking is sometimes part of the path. Dreaming about the thing. Agonizing over it. Going back and forth until you exhaust yourself. That’s human too.
And I also believe that if something is truly meant for you, the nudge will keep nudging.
But I think we can also speed up our own aliveness by saying yes more often.
By taking messy action.
Kids do this naturally all the time. They try things before they know how. They create before they’re good at it. They move before they feel ready.
And somewhere along the way, many of us learned we needed to be polished, certain, impressive, or fully prepared before doing the simplest thing our hearts were asking for.
Which brings me to the thing I finally decided to do.
A women’s circle.
A casual gathering of women. Community. Support. Reflection. Nervous system care. Honest conversation.
And do you know what’s funny?
I don’t have the fancy flyer finished.
I don’t have an automated registration link.
I don’t have every little logistical detail perfectly figured out.
I literally took my own advice and started with messy action.
I picked a date.
I sent the text.
Done.
Whoever feels called will come.
And I had to laugh at myself because for weeks now, “start women’s circle” has been sitting on my to-do list, untouched, while I overthought all the tiny details.
Perfectionism is sneaky like that.
So let me leave you with this:
Is there something you’ve been feeling nudged toward lately that you keep ignoring?
It doesn’t have to be huge. Maybe it’s not changing careers or moving across the world. Maybe it’s simply getting yourself to the beach. Sending the kind text. Taking the class. Starting the walk. Having the conversation.
Whatever it is, your heart wants you to do it.
And maybe spirit does too.
And if the thing you’ve been nudged toward is finding more community, support, and honest conversation with other women… maybe come join my women’s circle.
No fancy funnel. No complicated process.
Just message me.
However you normally reach me.
And maybe this can be your messy action too. :)
If something in this reflection stirred something in you, I recently shared a short video about messy action, overthinking, and learning to listen to the quieter nudges inside ourselves before fear talks us out of them.
It includes a simple somatic practice to help you slow down, tune inward, and reconnect with what your body might already be trying to tell you.
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