When Talking Isn’t Enough
When Talking Isn’t Enough
I first came to Brainspotting in my personal life when I was deciding whether or not to leave my marriage.
I had been in talk therapy with the most amazing therapist for many years. Over time, we had worked through so much — childhood wounds, money issues, career shifts. She was the perfect therapist for me for so long, and I grew tremendously working with her.
Until this one thing.
My marriage.
All signs pointed to it being over, yet I couldn’t make the break. I couldn’t take action. Of course I understood why — leaving a 15-plus-year relationship with two young children is massive. I couldn’t fathom how it could possibly work out, or what choosing myself would even look like.
I was talking myself in circles.
And then one day, I realized… I couldn’t talk about it anymore.
That’s when my therapist, in her deep wisdom, referred me to a colleague who specialized in somatic work - specifically, Brainspotting.
Ok. Now we’re talking! (But actually, quite the opposite… we were hardly talking at all.)
From my very first Brainspotting session, something clicked. My brain seemed to know exactly what to do, without me having to figure it out. There were no worksheets, no cognitive reframes, no lists of self-care tips. I simply brought up what I was struggling with and let my brain and body lead the way.
In my personal Brainspotting style as a client, I don’t talk much. I go inward (sometimes seeing images flash through my mind, sometimes old memories or current ones) but always staying connected to what my body is showing me.
The point of Brainspotting is to access the subcortical part of the brain - the non-thinking, non-verbal space where painful memories and emotions are stored. Even when we talk about them (using our frontal lobe), they often remain stuck in the limbic brain. When we find and hold a particular “spot,” it gives that deeper part of the brain permission to process and release.
We bypass the thinking brain.
Ahhhh, yes.
This aligns so beautifully with everything I already love (meditation, breathwork, movement) any practice that brings us out of our heads and into our bodies.
And it worked.
It wasn’t long after beginning Brainspotting that I finally took action. It gave me the courage to leave my long-over marriage, to clear limiting beliefs and conditioning, and to move forward.
I became unstuck. I was thawing, and ready to act.
What I love most about Brainspotting is that we don’t have to know anything. We don’t have to analyze, explain, or even understand why something feels hard. We don’t have to make sense of the past - we just allow the brain and body to do what they were designed to do: process, integrate, and bring us back to the present.
Over time, we simply start noticing that we’re making different choices.
Choices that come from our current wellbeing, not from our old stories or survival patterns. Life begins to feel more spacious, more honest, more aligned with who we are now.
That’s why I love offering Brainspotting to others. It’s not about fixing or forcing change; it’s about creating a safe space for the brain and body to find their way. Whether someone comes in feeling stuck, anxious, disconnected, or unsure of their next step, this work helps them reconnect to their full, natural capacity for life.
Curious what Brainspotting actually looks like?
If you felt resonance in this story (or if you’ve ever sensed that talking alone isn’t enough) I recorded a short video explaining what Brainspotting therapy is, how it works, and why it can help release stored trauma and create real expansion in your life.
👉 Watch “What Is Brainspotting Therapy? How It Helps Release Trauma & Create Expansion” to learn how this brain-body approach supports deep, lasting change - without forcing insight or over-explaining your pain.
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